Who Are You Following?

Posted by Sola Sisters

 Additional Resources 

Am I the Kind of Person That God Saves?

Kay Arthur (ministry to Christian women)

Former Nanny to Doug Phillips' Family Files Lawsuit, Alleges Sexual Misconduct

Posted by Christine Pack

Beall Phillips, Lourdes Torres, Doug Phillips

World Net Daily is reporting that Vision Forum's former president, Doug Phillips, has been named in a lawsuit by Lourdes Torres, a young woman who worked as a nanny for the Phillips' family beginning at the age of 15. Torres has filed a lawsuit against her former employer, alleging that Phillips committed "inappropriate, unwanted, and immoral sexual acts" against her while she worked and lived in the Phillips' home and tended to his children. The lawsuit was filed in Kendall County (Texas) Tuesday, April 15, 2014, and can be read here (Warning: Explicit content). However, according to Diaz Jakob, the attorney representing Doug Phillips, the relationship between Phillips and Torres was "consensual," and was "initiated, encouraged, and aggressively perpetuated by (Torres)." The statement released by Phillips also makes a point of noting that the contact between Phillips and Torres did not begin until Torres had reached the age of 23. While it has been confirmed by Torres' that physical contact did not begin until she had reached the age of 23, Torres had known and worked for Phillips from the age of 15. (Torres' family first met the Phillips family at a Vision Forum homeschooling conference.) Also, in the Vision Forum worldview, it must be understood that hyper-patriarchalism was in full force, with girls being viewed as property to be passed from father to husband. Many girls and young women in this Vision Forum system appear mature and capable, and in many ways they are, having been trained from very young ages to look after entire households. They are also trained to unquestioningly serve and obey their fathers, as well as all other male authority figures in their lives. It is for these reasons that Phillips's claim of the relationship being "consensual" rings hollow to me. (Phillips' statement released through his lawyer can be read in its entirety here.)

We reported last October that Phillips had resigned as president of Vision Forum after citing a personal moral failure (that article can be read here). As noted in that article, Phillips has long been the face of a particular branch of Reformed Christianity which models very rigid and oppressively legalistic family structures (led by the "Federal Head," the husband), promotes the Quiverfull lifestyle, enforces strictly supervised courtship dating for youth, and also teaches a form of Dominionism (got to have lots of babies, you see, through embracing the "quiverfull" teachings, if you're going to have any shot at taking Dominion of the world). Unfortunately, with Doug Phillips' moral failure, we are seeing yet more proof that Christian environments that have systematically built oppressive legalism into their structure are not safeguarded against sin. The law does not, and never has had, the ability to protect us against sin or sanctify us, and thinking so only leads to legalism, spiritual oppression and sin abounding all the more. Thus, systematizing legalism into entire movements (like Quiverfull, hyper-patriarchalism, Dominionism, Bill Gothard's ATI/IBLP systems, the Shepherding Movement, etc., etc. ) is no guarantee or insulator against sin, which is the great leveler of us all.

"Therefore no one will be declared righteous in God's sight by the works of the law; rather, through the law we become conscious of our sin." (Romans 3:20) 

"We maintain that a person is justified by faith apart from the works of the law." (Romans 3:20) 

"For when we were in the realm of the flesh, the sinful passions aroused by the law were at work in us, so that we bore fruit for death." (Romans 7:5)

Pastor Jeff Crippen of Christ Reformation Church in Oregon addressed this issue of legalism in a recent sermon, specifically naming Vision Forum as a legalistic and problematic movement:

"I think that Doug Phillips and Vision Forum have been proponents of a very legalistic, so called gospel, and it's not surprising then that sin is incited, because we know from scripture that the Law is the power of sin. And if you're gonna pursue rightness with God by the Law, well look out, because it's just going to feed sin." (How God Saves Us in Christ, 11-3-13)  

Lourdes Torres, Doug Phillips

Vision Forum Ministries had created an entire cottage industry devoted to resources based on lawkeeping and rules-based behaviorism, all geared toward producing perfect children, perfect wives, perfect husbands, perfect homes, perfect marriages, etc. Before closing, Vision Forum Ministries produced and sold all manner of material dedicated to training their devotees in the proper Vision Forum lifestyle, including wholesome, family-friendly videos, some of which featured Doug Phillips, his children and Lourdes Torres. By all appearances, those who bought into the Vision Forum mindset thought that by adding extrabiblical instructions and rules to their lives, they could safeguard themselves against sin. Sanctification via a step-by-step methodology: Insert Slot A into Slot B....... Sadly, their leader's profound moral failure has revealed what a demonic deception legalism is.

Some of the allegations in Torres' lawsuit:

"Douglas Phillips—standing in a position of influence and prominence within patriarchy—methodically groomed Ms. Torres so that she would eventually participate in illicit sexual rendezvous with him promising that she could one day marry him. This grooming began when Ms. Torres was a fifteen-year-old child." 

"Phillips repeatedly told Torres that this was possible because his wife, Beall Phillips, was going to die soon." 

"Douglas Phillips, on the evenings he visited Ms. Torres' (bedroom while she was living in the Phillips home), persuaded her that he was not doing anything wrong, that he intended to marry Ms. Torres, and that his wife would die shortly and enable him to marry Ms. Torres. He further repeatedly told Ms. Torres that he loved her, that he would take care of her, and that what they were doing was not wrong. He also stated that if it was wrong, it was completely her fault." 

"Ms. Torres was unable to consent to the sexual contact and repeatedly asked Defendant Douglas Phillips to stop. However, Ms. Torres did not tell anyone about Defendant’s conduct because he manipulated her into believing that it would ruin his reputation, destroy his ministry, and get her in trouble with the church." 

"On or about January 2, 2013—after 12:00 midnight—when Ms. Torres had refused to be alone with Defendant Douglas Phillips for several weeks, had stopped assisting him with Vision Forum work projects, and was no longer communicating with Douglas Phillips, Douglas Phillips came over to Ms. Torres’s house around midnight and began knocking on her bedroom window. Ms. Torres’s family heard the noise and Ms. Torres’s brother and father went outside and chased Douglas Phillips without knowing it was him. When they caught him Defendant stated he had come to “pay” Ms. Torres for her Vision Forum work. Ms. Torres’s father told Defendant Douglas Phillips to leave and he left." 

"On October 3, 2013, Ms. Torres received an e-mail from Beall Phillips threatening her if she did not keep silent about what happened to her, i.e., her abuse."

 Additional Resources 

Doug Phillips, Repentance and Justice

Copy of Filed Lawsuit (Warning: Explicit sexual content)

Doug Phillips of Vision Forum Resigns, Cites Moral Failure

Vision Forum Ministries to Close

Hall of Shame: Doug Phillips and Vision Forum (Mennoknight)

Rethinking Vision Forum

Christian Giant Sued For "Using Nanny As Sex Object" (World Net Daily)

Religious Right Leader Sued For Sexual Battery, Treating Young Follower Like A 'Personal Sex Object' (Right Wing Watch)

Woman Sues Christian Right Leader Douglas Phillips for Alleged Sexual, Mental Abuse (Slate)

Legal complaint filed in Vision Forum case (World Mag)

How God Saves Us In Christ (And Why Legalism Can't Help Us) (Pastor Jeff Crippen)

Why The Law Cannot Sanctify (Romans 7:5-6) (Pastor Kevin Williams)


 Doug Phillips Responds 

Former minister denies allegations that he kept woman as a 'sex object'

Doug Phillips' statement released through is attorney, Jason Jakob

Bill Gothard Legalism

Bill Gothard Legalism

Posted by Christine Pack

A couple of years ago, I innocently posted this illustration on my Facebook wall which to me at that time, illustrated what I thought was a biblical concept of submission in the home. Shortly after posting it, I began receiving information that this illustration had originated with a man named Bill Gothard, and who was a very influential figure, if not the most influential figure, in the hyper-patriarchal homeschooling movement I had just begun to research. (Note: Bill Gothard recently stepped down from the organization he founded years ago due to allegations of moral impropriety with young women working with his ministry.) 

Now, my having grown up in a very liberal mainline denomination sometimes means that I don't recognize legalism when I see it. That was certainly the case with this illustration. As one former Gothardite explained it, this picture is used to teach, wrongly, that God is harsh and unyielding, waiting to smite those who step out of line. From the article:

"One of the foundational truths of ATI was the 'umbrella of protection.' In a family structure, the father was the umbrella that protected his wife and children from Satan's attacks and God's judgments. If you stepped outside of that authority, you would face temptations and wrath. The umbrella came without an expiration date. As a teenager, the gradual increase of responsibility would not coincide with a gradual increase in decision-making. A young man would be eligible to step out from under the umbrella of protection only when he married. A young woman would only transfer from the father's umbrella to a husband's. This authoritarian approach forced the fear of both God and parents to become the main reason for obedience.......The ATI ministry structure was built around the same concept. Leadership within the organization provided the same protection from Satan and God. Questioning or challenging an interpretation of a verse or application of a principle was grounds for removal from the ministry." (Growing Up Gothard, my emphasis)

To be completely candid, with my non-legalistic background, I had looked at the umbrella illustration and my first thought was, oh God is so good to provide order and structure for us, and to watch over us! But once it was pointed out to me exactly how this picture is used, and that it goes further in using extrabiblical concepts to drive home its points, I did see the legalism. At that time, I was using this picture to illustrate submission to my own children, but once I grasped the problems with it, and how it could be twisted to cause fear of God rather than love for his genuine loving care and provision, I immediately stopped using it. I also sat down with my children and asked their forgiveness for using this illustration, and then used simple, straightforward Bible language and terminology to explain to them what it means for wives/children to submit. Yes, sin is serious, and should not be minimized or ignored, but I don't want my children cowering in fear of some angry God waiting to whack them any time they do something wrong. So, I no longer recommend or use this picture as an illustration for God's protection. After all, it is always the goodness of God that draws sinners, right? Yes, God is high and holy, and righteously wrathful toward unrepentant sinners. But it was love of an extraordinary, supernatural nature that compelled him to make a way for wretched sinners righteously deserving of hell to be reconciled to Himself.

In closing, I'd like to encourage any Christians who have somehow been influenced by Bill Gothard's teaching to look over the resources below. The American personality seems to love "systems" of all kinds, and with Bill Gothard's teachings, there is a massive system already in place that is very easy to plug into. Yet we must also be aware that the desire to systematize things can, and does, often lead to legalism. May we continue to return again and again to the simplicity that is found in Christ, and recognize and reject man-made systems, even those that dangle the carrot of the perfect family or perfect children or the perfect dating methodology, as Gothardism does.

 Additional Resources 

Josh Duggar's Infidelity Outed in Ashley Madison Website Hack (Sola Sisters)

A Beginner's Guide To Bill Gothard (Ron Henzel)

Growing Up Gothard (The Gospel Coalition)

A Matter of Basic Principles (an excellent expose of Gothard legalism by Don Veinot)

Battered Sheep - a review of Don Veinot's book A Matter of Basic Principles

Bill Gothard Resigns, Duggars Still Slated To Speak at IBLP 2014 Conference

Conservative Leader Bill Gothard Resigns Following Abuse Allegations (Religion News Service)

The Duggars, Bill Gothard, Vision Forum, and The Quiverful Movement (I am aware that some of the links in this article are no longer active, but this article still gives a quick thumbnail sketch of Bill Gothard, the Duggars, Vision Forum, Hyper-Patriarchy and the Quiverfull Movement, and how they are interconnected and overlap with each other)

How God Saves Us In Christ (And The Problems With Legalism) (Pastor Jeff Crippen)

Abusers in the Christian Church: The 5 Stages of Biblical Repentance (The Aquila Report)


 Midwest Christian Outreach 

From the IBLP website

A Matter of Basic Principles: Bill Gothard and the Christian Life

Josh Duggar, Mike Huckabee and Fodder for Progressives

Is Jesus a Sinner According to Bill Gothard’s Teachings?

If Bill Gothard is Wrong, Then What’s Right?

Bill Gothard: Who Knew What and When? A Question of Accountability

ATIdentity

Bill Gothard’s Analogous Teachings

Bill Gothard; Déjà vu All Over Again

Bill Gothard and the Continuing Sex Scandal

Bill Gothard - Truly Repentant?

Leveraging Lunacy: How Bill Gothard Rode a Wave of Evangelical Goofiness

Four part series on Bill Gothard
 - Part 1, Bill Gothard's Evangelical Talmud
 - Part 2, Bill Gothard's Chain of Authority
 - Part 3, Bill Gothard and the Law
 - Part 4, Bill Gothard's Mystical Approach to Medical Issues

An Evening With Bill Gothard

 Secular Articles 

When Having Kids Is A Religious Experience (ABC News)

Quiverfull: More Children For God's Army (Newsweek writer Kathryn Joyce)

Inside the Duggar Family's Conservative Ideology (Newsweek, Kathryn Joyce)

 Websites by Former Gothardites 

Recovering Grace

Abuse Allegations Against Bill Gothard, Founder of Institute In Basic Life Principles (Dr. John Cornish and Kari Underwood, co-founders of Recovering Grace)

Under Much Grace

Doug Phillips of Vision Forum Resigns, Cites Moral Failure [UPDATED]

Post by Christine Pack

(UPDATE 4-16-14: Doug Phillips' former nanny has filed a lawsuit against Phillips, alleging sexual misconduct. Our article about that can be read here. The filed lawsuit can be read here.... **warning, there is explicit sexual content in the filed lawsuit**)

  Thursday, October 31, 2013  

Doug Phillips has resigned as president of Vision Forum following his announcement of a moral failure, which according to his resignation letter, involved an "inappropriate relationship with a woman." Phillips has long been the face of a particular branch of Reformed Christianity which models very rigid family structures (led by the "Federal Head," the husband), promotes the Quiverfull lifestyle, enforces strictly supervised courtship dating for youth, and also teaches a form of Dominionism (got to have lots of babies, you see, through embracing the "quiverfull" teachings, if you're going to have any shot at taking Dominion of the world). I have personally counseled several women who have come out of this movement, and who didn't quite fit the mold for whatever reason, and whose experiences with Vision Forum leadership ranged from neglect to outright spiritual abuse.

I've also wondered at times, why the Vision Forum form of Dominionism seems to fly under the radar, as opposed to the New Apostolic Reformation (NAR) form of Dominionism. Probably because the NAR is so easily dismissed, with its angel feathers and gold dust silliness, while the Vision Forum crew are so theologically buttoned up as to seem to earn them a pass.

While I have long disagreed, oftentimes publicly, with many of the Vision Forum views, I have compassion in general for the body of Christ, including those who have been influenced by Vision Forum, Dominionism or Quiverfull legalism. Sadly, so many in Christendom seem to swarm from one big leader to the next, from one hot new book to the next, and now, those in the Vision Forum movement are witnessing the fall of one of the most high profile leaders in the Reformed camp. But Quiverfull legalism and hyper-separationism are no insulation against sin, which is the great leveler of us all. May we all be sobered by this latest scandal, and cleave to our Lord and Savior all the more.

I am sorry for these circumstance for Doug Phillips, and will be praying for him.

The original Statement of Resignation can be read here, along with the Clarification Statement which confirmed that there was a physical component to the "relationship."

 Additional Resources 

Former Nanny to Doug Phillips' Family Files Lawsuit, Alleges Sexual Misconduct

Copy of Filed Lawsuit (Warning: Explicit sexual content)

Doug Phillips of Vision Forum Resigns, Cites Moral Failure

Vision Forum Ministries to Close

Hall of Shame: Doug Phillips and Vision Forum (Mennoknight)

Rethinking Vision Forum

Christian Giant Sued For "Using Nanny As Sex Object" (World Net Daily)

Religious Right Leader Sued For Sexual Battery, Treating Young Follower Like A 'Personal Sex Object' (Right Wing Watch)

Woman Sues Christian Right Leader Douglas Phillips for Alleged Sexual, Mental Abuse (Slate)

How God Saves Us In Christ (And Why Legalism Can't Help Us) (Pastor Jeff Crippen)

Why The Law Cannot Sanctify (Romans 7:5-6) (Pastor Kevin Williams)


 Doug Phillips Responds 

Former minister denies allegations that he kept woman as a 'sex object'

Doug Phillips' statement released through is attorney, Jason Jakob

Should Christians Pay Any Attention To The Blood Moons Talk?

Posted by Christine Pack

“But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.” (Matthew 24:36)

For those who don't know what the blood moon chatter is all about, or have maybe heard something about it but don't know what it is, writer John Hagee has recently published a book which purports to have scientific evidence that there will be four lunar events which Hagee claims are known biblically (and prophetically) as "blood moons." These blood moons, Hagee claims, herald the beginning of the End Times. This teaching has inexplicably gone viral, with USA Today and CNN picking up the story, and #FourBloodMoons becoming one of the hottest trending topics on Twitter and Facebook. Even I got on Twitter and posted about it, and I never get on Twitter.

Merciful heavens. Christians, get hold of yourselves! The blood moons thing has been debunked. Thoroughly. Several times! As pastor and Christian apologist Chris Rosebrough recently noted in a couple of clever memes, the Four Blood Moons thing is absolute bunk, and is to 2014 what Hal Lindsey's Countdown to Armageddon was to the 1980s. Rosebrough has also done two excellent radio programs (linked below) devoted to debunking the blood moon nonsense that has been whipped up by John Hagee and Mark Blitz of El Shaddai Ministries. (El Shaddai is a ministry that is part of the Hebrew Roots movement, a dangerous movement with cult-like overtone which we recently wrote about......that article can be read here).

If John Hagee and Mark Blitz of El Shaddai were being honest, they would have to label this blood moons non-event "Four Regular Lunar Events That Signify Nothing." But that really doesn't have quite the same ring to it, does it? More resources below.....please feel free to forward them or apply as needed.

 Additional Resources 

Four Blood Moons Debunked

Upcoming ‘Blood Moon’ Lunar Eclipses Spark Woes, Discussion About End Times Bible Prophecy

Will Lunar Eclipses Cause Four Blood Moons in 2014 and 2015? (Answers in Genesis)

Does Tuesday's blood eclipse signal the End Times? (USA Today)

Does the Bible predict the 'blood moon'? (CNN)


 Chris Rosebrough (Fighting For The Faith Radio) 

Debunking the Four Blood Moons - Part 1

Debunking the Four Blood Moons - Part 2

Christians and Making Decisions

Posted by Christine Pack

I have a hunch that the sticking point for many Christians in their day-to-day lives is that they think if they somehow get a feeling or mysterious "inner nudge" that God "confirms" a decision they are trying to make, then that decision will result in a situation that is pain-free, hassle-free, problem-free and conflict-free. But do we recognize that there are no such guarantees from God in the Bible? Life is fraught with difficulties and struggles which come along even after we've made calm, measured, thoughtful decisions which accord with God's will (meaning, they aren't sinful in nature).

Attached are a series of resources that will, I hope, help Christians confused about how it is, biblically, that we are to make decisions. I pray that anyone reading this short article will be blessed by the attached resources, and will be freed from the bondage of thinking that they are somehow "out of God's will" if they have struggles and difficulty and pain and heartbreak in their lives. As long as we as Christians are not sinning in our decisions, we have freedom. Period! And oftentimes, our sovereign, loving God will use the difficulties we encounter in life as a sanctifying agent in our lives. Amen? So pray for wisdom (because God will grant it to those who pray for it--James 1:5), be thoughtful, be calm, don't sin, and go forward in peace with your decisions.

Just Do Something: A Liberating Approach to Finding God's Will

Just Do Something (audio message, Kevin DeYoung)

How Do We Discern God's Will For Our Lives?

Finding God's Will

 Critical Issues Commentary - Articles 

God's Will and Christian Liberty

God's Revealed Will

 Critical Issues Commentary - Radio 

Personal Words From God (CIC-Radio, Bob DeWaay)

God's Will and Christian Liberty (CIC-Radio, Bob DeWaay)

photo credit: Lori Greig via photopin cc

A Sister In Need

Posted by Christine Pack and Cathy Mathews

"Sing to God, sing in praise of his name, extol him who rides on the clouds; rejoice before him—his name is the Lord. A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling." (Psalm 68:4-5) 

"When you go through deep waters, I will be with you." (Isaiah 43:2)

"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress......" (James 1:27)

Two nights ago, the phone rang at 10:30. Not the latest we've ever gotten a phone call.....but definitely later than most calls. As I picked it up, I turned to my husband and half jokingly said, "I hope this isn't bad news." But it was. My sister was on the other end, weeping. She told me that the young husband of a friend of ours had unexpectedly passed away due to complications from diabetes. The husband's name was Toby, and he was only 36 years old. Toby's wife, Amanda, was now a widow with 4 young children.

Toby Youngblood had met, fallen in love with, and married a young, single mother named Amanda. Toby and Amanda only had 5 short years together before his sudden death. Toby was a loving stepfather to Amanda's daughter from her previous marriage, and then in short order, God had blessed them with first one son (now 4 years old) and then twin boys (who are now 2 years old). Toby was a hardworking and devoted husband and father, but had recently lost his job, and so the young family was struggling. They did not have health insurance, and Toby was mowing lawns on weekends to make ends meet. (Click here or at the Go Fund site linked to learn how to donate to this family in great need.)

Cathy Mathews, who writes here on the Sola Sisters blog with me, was and is extremely close to Amanda. They met through church in Arkansas (where they both live) six years ago, and quickly became close. My sister has been like a big sister/mother to her.....she's not quite old enough to be Amanda's mother, but they have had a very nurturing, mother/daughter type relationship.

Cathy and I both knew Amanda before she was saved, back when she was struggling spiritually and had lots and lots and lots of questions. Did I mention that she had lots of questions? Oh my, yes! I was the out-of-towner, and only saw Amanda occasionally, when visiting, and on a few vacations that we all took together. But on those visits and vacations, I remember several late night conversations with me, Cathy and Amanda, sitting up into the wee hours, fiercely and passionately discussing God, theology, truth, doctrine, and the excellencies of Christ. By that time, Amanda had experienced many losses in her young life. About 10 years prior, two of her brothers had been killed in a traffic accident while on the way to theirs and Amanda's other brother's wedding. Her stepfather had died 7 years prior. Amanda had been through a difficult divorce and was raising her daughter as a single parent. Surely, a recipe for bitterness and despair? And yet, through it all, God saw fit to gently and mercifully, as a loving Father, bring Amanda through those losses into saving faith in Christ's sacrifice. I've had the privilege of watching—at times up close, at times from afar—as Amanda went from being kind of a tough girl, lost and confused, to being very strongly rooted and grounded in God's word. My heart is quite simply broken for her in this loss.

And yet, as Cathy pointed out to me yesterday, Amanda was blessed by God to be married to a man such as Toby. Toby was also deeply rooted in God's word and truth, and had the habit of dwelling on, and pointing others to, God's sovereignty. Toby would be telling Amanda even now, "Trust God, even when the circumstances don't look good to us." We ask you to join us in praying that for Amanda. We also ask for the following prayers:

⋄ Please pray for her and her children 

⋄ Pray she will trust The Lord for the next step in front of her 

⋄ Pray for God to protect her against bitterness 

⋄ Pray she will put on her armor and stand strong 

⋄ Please pray for financial provision 

⋄ Please pray she will feel assured of God's love & care for her through the Body of Christ 

⋄ Please for the tiny church (about 30 total) where Amanda's and Cathy's families are members, that they will minister to her well 

Body of Christ, this where the rubber meets the road. I'm asking all who are reading this to prayerfully consider making a donation to this young widow in need. For those who would like to make a donation to the Youngblood family, any contribution, no matter how small, would be greatly appreciated. The financial need in this family right now is profound.

In closing, I want to share two of Amanda's recent Facebook posts. Through tears, I have been astonished and humbled while reading these to see Amanda praising the Lord for his goodness in these circumstances. These posts have been profoundly encouraging to me. I have also been updated by my sister about how their tiny church has hastened to come along this dear sister of theirs, and help her bear her burden. To any lost people reading this, THIS kind of supernatural kindness and peace is what the Lord offers through the atoning work done by Christ.......peace in the most difficult of circumstances, peace in the most painful of trials, but most of all, all of it meant to point us to the goodness of God, who not only makes a way for sinners to be reconciled to Him, but who also bears our burdens with us, hears our prayers, and promises that one day He will wipe every tear from our eyes.

This is what Amanda wrote on April 8 (the day after Toby died):

Dear friends from near and far:  As some of you surely have heard, I need to confirm, I woke up this morning to find my sweet husband Toby Youngblood had passed away during the night in his sleep, due to diabetes complications. It was VERY unexpected ...my heart is breaking, and I know you precious believers in Christ, many of whom I've never met, will be covering me and my 4 kids and extended family in your prayers. So thank you, so much, in advance. I also know you who are believers will be able to rejoice with me, as we know for sure, without a doubt, that toby is diabetes free now, but MOST importantly, he's sin free and basking in the beautiful presence and glory of our Savior since sometime during the night...and for that, I'm jealous! Please feel free to keep reminding me of this in the coming days and weeks. And if you're reading this and have no idea what I'm talking about, how I can know FOR SURE where he is and what he's doing, I'd love to personally explain it to you. And how, even in this, I CAN say, God is so good, beyond gracious, and has carried me through this horrific day. I pray YOU know this most gracious, abounding in mercy God like Toby did here, and is getting the full realization of at this moment!

And then on April 9:

Dear friends and family, first let me say, it has ONLY been by all your prayers lifted up on my family's behalf today that we can say, the day is over, we got through it. I'm being blown away seeing the precious body of Christ, from near and far, doing so wonderfully what we're called to do, bear each other's burdens, walk with each other through immense pain, provide sacrificially and abundantly to meet each other's needs. God IS being glorified. And many people will see God's church at work, ministering to my family, and He will be even more glorified! And just think...Toby gets a front row seat to that glory! I'm a bit jealous!

May God be glorified as onlookers watch Amanda in this trial, and witness a peace that can only be attributed to a supernatural work of God. To God be all the glory.